i never love someone like this

i know that i have been playing around quite sometimes. i am a selfish person who always think for myself. in a relationship ill do what i think its right but apparently thts not how its supposed to be. i always left out and didnt hear what others opinion cuz i always think im the right one. and i dont know ive been doing that all this while. i used to bare myself to my friends and they did told me about what i did and all and i just thought im not that bad. but the ugly truth is yes i am. i am a mean person who didnt care about anyone else. im a self centred person and im always being judgemental.  

but the day ive meet you , you held my hand. you proved to me that two world apart can be one. i never love someone like this. you helped me you fix me but i always messed things up again and again. again and again.  i always being the one who is stubborn and saying im the right person and make other feel shit. thts who i am and im worried u will give up on me. im want to fix myself i want to fix the way how i think cuz it always ruined us. i need to hold u n grab u before u get so far from me. we are slowly parting away i need to do something to fix us up. alhamdulillah you and i know we need a lil bit fixing and im trying here. i try so bad even i always end up to be the stubborn n she is so mrs right! sgt menyampah dgn diri sndiri. 

i need to do something i know i need to comeup with something i will  i will i promise myself i will. 

to the one that i love.

forgive me.

http://youtu.be/U8SVsEDoawc

regret

am i too bad? am i too evil? am i the one who always screw up? i cant even look at myself. im selfish who just think about myself. i should shut my mind and just bare with the pain. n now no one wants me .

Europe Trip (Manchester - Berlin)

Its been a while I didnt write my blog. It takes a lot of effort to post this story because i know i wouldnt do it if i went back home. Lol ! So here i am in the train on our way to vienna from prague writing on my europe trip. ok here it is , all my life i have been dreaming on since i was a kid to travel the whole world and europe is the continent that i want to explore. Allhamdulillah ive  dream big and Allah gave me the chance to study in oversea. Today is the third day of our exploration. We began from berlin which is our first destination. The reason Im posting this blog I know there people are always looking for information especially if they are travelling europe and with they intended to have the same journey path like we did. Its better i do in Q&A format because it would not make me merapu and goes on writing senseless. 👍👍

So first step :

1) How did you travel in Europe?

I am using Eurail travel pass with selected countries by train. The price is worth it less than 200 pound equivalent approximate RM 1000 Malaysia to 4 countries you choose by yourself.

The terms of the travel pass is you may travel 6 days in two months which means   kita boleh travel di dalam 4 negara yang dipilih dgn mengunakan train international di dalam tempoh dua bulan. 

So if contoh kita ade bapak sedara ker aunty ker duduk  munich berlin ker prague ker boleh la stay situ lama lama before sambung trip train ke tempat lain pulak. 

2) Which country did you choose?

We choosed Germany-Austria-Czech Republic - Italy 

This is the cities or places that we decided to stop. 

Berlin-Prague/Praha-Vienna/Wien-Munich-Salzburg-Rome-Venice

3)What is eurail ?

The company that offer train services in the europe. There are lots of train that connects between negara-negara di europe and eurail offer different type of passes specifically for travelers who want to travel to and fro in europe countries.

boleh pergi ke website die and findout pasal eurail.

www.eurail.com

i want to continue writing about my trip and information lain tetapi sudah drowsy and i really need sleep. will be writing again on the next train trip to munich. 

apa-apapun i will post some picture to describe the whole journey!

Our first day of journey Manchester to Berlin 

My traveling partners Dhiya and inas. anem who take the picture.

this is our flight from manchester to berlin.

Manchester to Berlin 4hours flight duration by easy jet. 

famous landmark in berlin Brandenburger tor.

and of course the berlin wall

will continue after this 

2009-2012

Hargai memori ini. Kita tak mampu kembali utk merasakannya. Terimakasih atas segala galanya.

epic song from school memories

keep playing this song

hati pedih
mata masuk habuk
hingus leleh
susah la aih
bile hati dah cabuk

sudoh sudoh laa
permainan hati ni
xpernah nak betul

mode royan

Realitinya aku menangis

Serius aku insan lemah.
Serius aku insan yg mampu di goda oleh musuh  manusia iaitu syaitan.  Serius aku mempersoalkan urusan tuhan.
Serius aku ni tak bersyukur.
Serius aku ni mcm x payah sembahyang pun x apalah.
Serius apa yang aku cakap ni hasil dari luluhnya hati dari harapan.
Serius aku perlukan penyelesaian. Serius aku tahu ini ujian utkku tetapi kenapa susah sgt utk aku terimanya. Serius aku x mampu buat apa-apa.

Kau tuhan aku hamba mu.

Aku skrg ini ibarat hitam.
Serius aku perlukan mu Puteh.

Serius puteh yang tak putus harapan dgnku yang hingga extreme bagi aku penampor laju laju biar aku sedar sket.

Bukan apa penampor tuh utk aku sedar betapa hinanya keadaan aku skrg ini.

Serius aku nak kau.

Puteh!

Serius puteh aku tahu kau adlh harapan tuhan bgi utk aku.

P/s: aku bukak mata nangis kembali. Best betul kalau aku dlm dunia mimpi dan bukan realiti.

6.09pagi

Jenis Lelaki

Lelaki

Yang paling sweet itu yang bagi tahi.

P/s: doakan aku untuk masa depan aku yang jauh tak tentu lagi.