puberty stage?

What is wrong with me? tell yourself what is wrong with you? What made you cried, suddenly? Why you always take thing seriously .Why you always make yourself hurt. Why can’t you be someone else? Someone who care less, who never take responsibility, who doesn’t care for everything, who only think for herself, who can be selfish for their own good , someone who is just happy for themselves. Why and why? I just can’t be like her because it is not me.


Tears are drooling from my eyes like a river yet I still don’t know what is wrong with me. Yey ! Abruptly I’m singing JT cry me a river in my head!



Mums always right for whatever she will be saying. She always remind me “stop being a kid and don’t cry too much, be an adult ieka”.


Then she will be asking question:


When will u be a grown up adult?


I answered her with just a short cackle. I know the answer doesn’t make the cut but temporarily it’s okay.


Because that question always been in my head always! Always like forever.

There are e lots of thing I don’t know about myself:

Like why you always nice to people even they are mean to you?

Like why you like to sacrifice for others while the others don’t care less.

Like why you always act like you don’t care but the real thing is you care much?

Like why you so hard to express utterly word by word to anyone?

Like why you always in a comfort zone when it comes to a relationship?: alia yg ckp.I still wonder what is actually behind her lines.

And the list went on and on …

Until it don’t make sense.

Those question aren’t going to end and I don’t need to figure it out because it is just makes me nuts. So by the end of writing this post, I am slowly recovering. :)

fate to believe!

Syafika binti Mohd Ghazi will be going:

UPM
COMMUNICATION
3 YEARS

wish me luck

Behind Hotdogs

It is wrong if our imaginations run wild and we didn’t even bother to end it because it gave us a slightly happiness? We know that it would never come true yet we still keep on imagine things because we never knew, it might be true someday. Someday, one day or in future that I referred to is actually our hoped. Hope is like twin sister or brother to imagination as when we are imagine things the reality of yourself actually desperately hoped that things turned out to be like the one in your imaginary land. All of us had been through this sheepishly imaginary land when we are toddlers and up till now we are still imagining widely over the universe.



The same thing goes to myself as I always been imagine things. Like, when my sister and I had been watching travel ASTRO channel one day. The Country that they are showing is United States and they are really famous for their hotdogs. At first I really caught myself extremely hungry as I watched lot of image of hotdogs been cooked. Then I move my head to my sister who is beside me and my mind runs wild thinking, what if we open up a hotdog stall in Malaysia. My sister sudden give a slightly nod with another idea. We opened up a stall only for hotdogs and no burger as Ramlee burger already exist. We will be like subway but ours are Malaysian made and cheaper. We will be rich, popular as our hotdogs are so tasty and we will be making into television show.



Our conversation runs excitedly unstoppable and there, we just had thrown ourselves into joyfully imaginary land. Five minutes of happiness and we feel very content at that time. Mama realized that we are dreaming on, she grinned to both of us and her smiled remind us that any idea of ours never going to be real. Yet I feel very happy for having these 5 minutes of bliss. We both know that we are wasting our time on the hotdogs but it is okay, we know the fact there is nothing wrong when we let ourselves be in another world beside reality.

sapporo trip part 1

the night before i flew to japan my mum couldnt stop babbling from a to z's as she went on and on like have u packed ur underwear or have u bring ur toothbrush and its leading on "take care of yourself and doa byk2 kalo org tegur jgn ikot " shes freaking out because it is my first time travel alone without my parents to sum kind of foreign country. im kinda lepak je but takut gak la coz they mostly dont speak english so that is what i am going to deal with. hahah
but in the end everything went okay , the flight was okay eventhough i have lost my ticket for my first flight from malaysia to narita ap then i found it back without telling my mum , luckily. lol
then im having jet lagged n i fall asleep at haneda airport without thinking other ppl . what do i care. yaalah im foreigner sorg jer pki tudung plek sket la tp pe ku kesah blasah je la dah penat. ngeh*) then finally i arrived at sapporo chitose and my sista wasnt there. lambt sket buat aku cuak je . so here adela pic sket2 yg dah edited.

my new munchkin

This is my new munchkin ganti the old one lovie.
btw this is her birth certificates :

Name: TOTTY AKIKO YUN-CHA or

とっつ明子ゆんちゃ

Date of birth: 6th JUNE 09

Birthplace: University of Hokaiddo , Japan

sex: female (determined by ieka)

Birth fee: 300 yen

Sweetest memory : the moment ieka buys me , and
when ieka cuddle me thru the nite.

unforgettable memory: the moment ieka’s butt pressing my face

sad memory: ieka couldnt find me where im stucked
in piles of clothes

lol im kinda fall in love at the first sight with totty so i decided to buy her
lgpon die murah hahahn plus its for the sake of charity.