puberty stage?

What is wrong with me? tell yourself what is wrong with you? What made you cried, suddenly? Why you always take thing seriously .Why you always make yourself hurt. Why can’t you be someone else? Someone who care less, who never take responsibility, who doesn’t care for everything, who only think for herself, who can be selfish for their own good , someone who is just happy for themselves. Why and why? I just can’t be like her because it is not me.


Tears are drooling from my eyes like a river yet I still don’t know what is wrong with me. Yey ! Abruptly I’m singing JT cry me a river in my head!



Mums always right for whatever she will be saying. She always remind me “stop being a kid and don’t cry too much, be an adult ieka”.


Then she will be asking question:


When will u be a grown up adult?


I answered her with just a short cackle. I know the answer doesn’t make the cut but temporarily it’s okay.


Because that question always been in my head always! Always like forever.

There are e lots of thing I don’t know about myself:

Like why you always nice to people even they are mean to you?

Like why you like to sacrifice for others while the others don’t care less.

Like why you always act like you don’t care but the real thing is you care much?

Like why you so hard to express utterly word by word to anyone?

Like why you always in a comfort zone when it comes to a relationship?: alia yg ckp.I still wonder what is actually behind her lines.

And the list went on and on …

Until it don’t make sense.

Those question aren’t going to end and I don’t need to figure it out because it is just makes me nuts. So by the end of writing this post, I am slowly recovering. :)